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No matter how good or bad a week may have been so far, it always ends up with a wonderful pick-me-up called the Six Sentence Sunday! Today, because of the stupid solar storm, I have this piercing headache. No, the three glasses of wine I had yesterday had nothing to do with it... of course not. Wine is my friend, Gale is not. How are all your heads today? Better, I hope! Anyways, let's dive back in where we left off. --->That's what went down last week in The Days Adrift. 3 girls 1 boat, and not much room to spare...
Brita is a
pretty girl, small and slender, with dark raven hair and a facial expression that wavers between aloof and helpless countless times a day. Boys liked to look after her whenever she strolled along the streets, sometimes they would walk up to her and ask her things. Tams is not nearly as pretty,
if the label 'pretty' even applies at all. She has beefy arms and legs, and frizzy hair, faintly reminiscent of dried up briarwood just before the storm. Tams has
the dog smarts thing going for her, and a keen nose to sniff out all kinds of opportunities and people.
Her nose, however, was green enough to let her get involved in murder.
Great descriptions; I really want to get to know these girls better.
ReplyDeleteHi Karen, I think I can make that happen one of those Sundays. Glad you enjoyed! :)
DeleteLast line is so cool!
ReplyDeleteThank you Maryellen!!
DeleteGood descriptions of the girls. I'm curious about them. I like how you used "dog smarts" and then went with "keen nose to sniff out...." Clever!
ReplyDeleteI'm relieved to hear it's not "too much". I was tempted to write about paws as well.. but I would hate to see Tams associated with a real dog :) Thank you!
DeleteI agree with Karen. Your descriptions are outstanding!
ReplyDeleteI loved this closer on this week's six! :-)
"Her nose, however, was green enough to let her get involved in murder."
Good six, Dana!
Hi Teresa :) That's so good to hear! I'm always in admiration of good closers. Such a talented bunch, the Sunday crowd! :) Never thought I'd manage to have a good "punch line" myself.. Thank you!
DeleteYou've done a wonderful job describing the differences between the two characters. Tams hair sounds an awful lot like my own. I'm very curious about the dog smarts. Excellent six.
ReplyDeleteJudging from your profile picture, I can safely say that your hair looks nothing like the mop I had in mind... Doc Brown crazy hair!! Thank you Jess! :)
DeleteYou do it to me every Six Sentence Sunday, Dana. I either fall off my chair in laughter or double take in awe. This time it's both.
ReplyDeleteThis "She has beefy arms and legs, and frizzy hair, faintly reminiscent of dried up briarwood just before the storm." Is phenomenal! And that last line hooks me in for the whole of the story.
Great Six yet again this week! And I love your new "about me" image. Very "fantasy" looking and beautiful.
Ah, Mel you're back! I missed you last Sunday! Thank you for always encouraging me to really go for it. Less dictionary, more "strange" intuitions - that's my new motto (should be written down on a post-it, huh..)
DeleteI think thanks to you, I have become more brave in my phrasings.
I'm always looking forward to reading your comments. Unfortunately, this Sunday I haven't gotten my lazy behind up to participating myself, but on the other hand, I'll have more time to read and comment on the other sixers.. so, see you in a bit!
I'm glad you've resolved to let your intuitions run. Your language translation actually gives you a clever advantage in that the words you choose, words Americans take for granted in everyday speech and slang, become very powerful within your context. From your writing I'm left thinking "what a clever way to use that word or phrase".
DeleteI'm fond of your new motto as well. If you're inclined to share (no copyright police ;) I may jot that on my bathroom mirror, and of course post-it note on my monitor.
Thank you for your insightful comments as well. In response to your comment on my 7/22/12 SSS Post I've left the John Donne poem that I derive a great deal of inspiration from for my story, Squishing Whistle Pigs.
Great character descriptions...the beefy arms and legs...yep. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThank you Ann, I'm glad you liked it. :)
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